Are you old enough to remember the old ad asking, “How do you spell relief?” In the ad, the answer given was “R-O-L-A-I-D-S.” It was an ad for Rolaids™. Like all such ads, the claim was that this product would relieve heartburn. I’m not interested in selling meds or discussing advertising. I want to call to mind a subject we church leaders (especially those of us who work with small churches) need to come to terms with:

How do you spell success?

This is not as simple as one might imagine. For so many, ministry success is defined by numbers. If many are reached, many come, and many contribute, then we are successful. If not, then we failed. This is just false thinking for several reasons. One reason is the meaning of “many.” A town of 500 will be different from a town of 2 million. And what if you are in a community very resistant to the gospel—like many Muslim-majority countries? To have a handful of conversions in a lifetime of service would look like a failure in much of the world, but in these places, that kind of response is a dream for many.

How we define success matters. It matters for us and our motivation. It matters for our people. It also matters for the Kingdom. Vater’s The Grasshopper Myth (2012) is an excellent book for this. According to the author, the Grasshopper Myth is “The false impression that our Small Church ministry is less than what God says it is because we compare ourselves with others.” This tendency can be deadly for small church leaders.

When I first entered the ministry, I noticed that when pastors gathered, they started with questions about the size of each other’s congregations, facilities, etc. You could see them comparing themselves to each other. In some settings, they would even unconsciously enter a class structure where those with larger churches were the upper class, and those with small churches fell into the lower class. The large church pastors were invited to speak, and the pastors of smaller churches were expected to listen. This is because of the idea that success was spelled by numbers: number of people, number of seats, number of staff, and number of dollars (though few like to admit that last one). Small church pastors were taught to strive to be large church pastors.

There is an old joke that unintentionally illustrates some of this thinking. It is said there was a seminary professor who told his students, “When you graduate and get assigned to your first church, buy the heaviest leather-bound Bible you can find.” When asked why, he responded, “Because your first church will likely be a small rural church, and you will need to use the Bible to beat the dogs off you on the way to the door when visiting your people.” While it is funny because all rural pastors have experienced this, it is also a sad illustration of what I’m addressing. The small rural church is not seen as the place and setting to which one has been called—the ministry to which one aspires. The small church is seen as just one step among many on the way to pastoral success. When I left an urban setting with a population of millions to take a small rural church in a tiny town in Northern Wisconsin, some friends said this was a waste because there were so few people. Don’t the people in small towns need to hear the gospel? Don’t small churches need pastors to shepherd them? Jesus died for those who live in small communities, who will only be reached through small churches.

The problem is not size. The problem is not budgets or programs. The problem is our definition of success. Success in a struggling church will not look like success in a mature, healthy church—no matter the size.

Suppose you pastor a church that lost its drive for outreach. They have become inward-focused for a long time and have lost sight of the world around them. As the pastor, you want to develop outreach, so you make a plan. You get your people to help draw in their friends and neighbors to a special presentation with the hope that people will come and hear the gospel. Even after your people’s hard work, only one or two community members attend. Was this a success? If those people came to know Christ, I hope you will credit it as successful—even if a single person. But the next time you present another outreach idea, you will undoubtedly hear, “We tried that before, and only a couple came.” This happens when success is weighed as numbers instead of obedience. Instead of “Was it a success?” a better question would be, “Was it an act of obedience?” Obedience matters far more than success (as we define it) in the Kingdom of God. If we truly understood it, we would realize that obedience and success are synonyms in the Kingdoms. If we obeyed, we succeeded. To succeed, be obedient.

This applies in more areas than just outreach. Let me give you an example from my church. We host and operate a Baby Booth yearly at our local Fall Fest. We set up a tent for parents to change diapers, feed babies, and whatever else they need. The purpose is to show love to our community. Anyone who has taken babies to such things would agree few things are worse than trying to change your baby’s diaper in a Port-a-Potty. Several of our ladies are involved in operating the booth and being on-site. Though we have done it for years and put up signs, very few parents use the tent. But they walk by and see our sign. They see our people. We are lovingly being part of the community. The organizers appreciate it, and even those who do not use the tent will say how great it is that we are there. Should we weigh success by the number of people who use the tent or by the fact that we are seen loving our community? I prefer the latter.

Don’t get me wrong. There are times when numbers and metrics must be used. If there are expenses, it is wise to wonder if funds are being used in the best way possible. It could be discovered that it would be better to put the money used in one program into another. That is not the same as weighing success.

I am trying to say that your church may be in a condition where just getting the people to do something is a great success. If that is the case, then don’t judge yourself by whether you are drawing as many as the church down the street. I know of a church that recently did its first school supply giveaway. The people worked hard to gather supplies and backpacks to give to schoolchildren. The turnout was not huge, but everything was received with appreciation. Should this be measured as a success? Should we set a metric to judge and say, “If X number of kids show up, it is a success. But if lower than that, it is a failure.” How does one weigh the perception that our church loves the children of our town? How about the satisfaction the church’s people experienced from doing something for others? What about the value of simple obedience?

First, stop comparing yourself to other churches. Stop comparing yourself to other pastors. Compare yourself to the call God placed upon you. Are you being obedient? Are you obeying with your all? If so, how can you credit that as failure? You can’t.

Second, stop looking at numbers—return on investment is not the standard in kingdom work. There are some other things to look at:

“We never did this before, but now we have.”

“We never thought it possible, but now we know better.”

“Last year, three people came; this year, five people came.”

 “Now we know how to improve this program.”

“Our people were not involved before, but now they are.”

There are many others.

The best standard for success is whether you are being obedient. Let Him take care of the numbers and results if you are. If not, then that is the only failure you should dread.